Why are my closets so organized? Why is my condo so tidy? One reason is because the state of my belongings is one of the few things I can control in my life as a Gainfully Unemployed. In my world where a large chunk of my success is determined by others approving of my work.
I can remind my various agents of my existence, but I can’t ensure that they’ll submit me for any auditions. I can send mailings to casting directors, but I can’t make them choose me for an audition after the agent submits my headshot. And, no matter how well I say the copy, I certainly can’t make the client choose me from the videotaped auditions…especially if they had a tall blonde in mind.
Nor can I control:
1) scheduling. Shooting on the independent feature film I was originally asked to save two days this week for…has now been postponed until early next year.
2) timing. I can write award winning manuscripts, but I can’t make the editors who’ve requested them respond. I will sell, but when?
As you might imagine, all this can be extremely frustrating. Last night I attended a Winter Solstice yoga class. We were asked to write down something we wanted to let go of and throw the piece of paper into the fire. I chose to rid myself of frustration. As my second effort caught fire (the first fell to the bottom of the fireplace. Hmmm. I needed to see the thing burn.), I did feel calmer.
Can I control how long the feeling lasts?