There’s a scene in Gone with the Wind where Scarlett is at an upscale restaurant with Rhett.  She’s stuffing her face with one of the many delicious-looking desserts spread on the table before her.  A waiter passes by carrying a tray heaped with more amazing desserts.  She points eagerly and says something like, “Oooh, I want that one.” 

Many of us have so much.  Yet we still desire or must buy the next shiny thing right now, whether it be a new cell phone or other updated electronic or technology item, trendy clothes, or the latest thing in home decor.  We want to be the cool kid on the block by being the first to have the iPad3 or the latest popular app.  The media and advertisers play on this urge via intriguing articles, stellar reviews and tempting ads.  Advances in technology have made purchasing easier than ever…such as Amazon.com’s one click. 

Some of us seem to be incapable of saying no to ourselves, of denying or even postponing a purchase until they’ve saved up or at least can get that item on sale.  Some may not even compare prices to see if there’s a better deal.  The immediate gratification of ownership and playing with a new toy prevails over common sense and the size of our bank accounts. Self-control and caution are thrown to the wind. 

Retail therapy may soothe us, make us feel better in the short term.  We may enjoy our new toy(s).  But how many have buyer’s remorse, or feel guilty when the bill arrives?  Go deeper into credit card debt or put off home repair or a medical expense?   

So much advice is offered about shopping with care…don’t go to the grocery when you’re hungry, make a list of what you need, etc.  But in the moment, many don’t heed it. 

Do you:
–know how much you’ve spent in the last month on things you don’t really need?  (For example, how much did you spend on coffee, drinks and eating out?  What percent of your monthly income goes to entertainment, and how does that compare to what finacial advisors recommend?)
–hide purchases (or dissemble about the cost) from your significant other? 
–defensively justify spending money? 
–have an emergency account of three to six months of expenses? 

If you answer ‘no’ to all of the above, consider taking steps to curb your spending. 

5 Tricks to Avoid Impulse Buys

Be Vigilant to Avoid Impulse Purchases

12 Ways to Avoid Impulse Buying  

Purchases Spouses Hide From Each Other

Whether bosses/managers approve or not, some Gainfully Employed go to work when they’re sick.  Even if they have sick days.  Maybe they have an urgent deadline, or maybe they want to show their dedication.  Or maybe they want to save their sick days in case they’re so sick they can’t get out of bed.

The Gainfully Unemployed don’t have sick days, nor in most cases do we want to risk losing a booking.  If the project involves telecommuting, we can sneeze and sniffle without infecting others.  Or we might be able to work for a bit, then nap for a bit.  Unless there’s a video conference, no one will care if our noses are red or if we stay in our pajamas and/or bathrobe all day.  

But when a voiceover talent has laryngitis, no work can be done.  Nor is there any way to know how long it will last.  A VO friend said hers lasted two weeks.  So we miss out on auditions, and either lose booking(s), or hope the client is willing to and has time before they have to turn in the finished commercial or narration to reschedule. 
 
Last Sunday, I woke up with laryngitis.  Not the kind that leaves you sounding sort of sexy and husky, but completely without a voice.  Because I had two VO jobs on Wednesday, I did my best to speed up recovery by following much of the advice I found.  The best remedy is time.  Most importantly, don’t talk.  Whispering is worse.  Keep your vocal chords moist, drink a lot of water, partake of throat lozenges.  Tea with honey (though I think some of my tea was caffeinated, against recommendaitons).  I had a friend read what I typed into a Word document so I could participate in a conference call.  I even rested for a couple of days.  I didn’t, but probably should have, gargle with salt water.  A couple of sites listed herbal or homeopathic options, but I wasn’t too sure about those. 

Tuesday morning, I still didn’t have a voice and doubted enough would return in 24 hours.  So I contacted the necessary parties, fully expecting both to move on to another talent and get the job done.  I was quite pleasantly surprised and appreciative when both decided to reschedule for next week.  Now it’s Thursday afternoon.  My voice is low and gravelly, and my throat is still scratchy.  I’m sure by the weekend I’ll be fine and back to normal. 
Whew.    

Facebook is in the news even more than usual as it prepares for its IPO.  Hard to believe that a service launched only eight years ago now reportedly has more than eight million users and has become an integral part of many of our lives. 

Facebook is an amazing way to stay in touch with long distance friends, to reconnect with peeps from our past.  But more and more, many take the ease of use and 24/7 availablity of FB too far.  Are you one of the people who, whenever anything of note (or not of note) happens, immediately compose a status update in your head and have the urge to post ASAP?  How many times a day do you hop on? 

Can you go a single day without using FB–without catching up with friends and “friends,” sharing personal or newsy notes, or commenting or liking?  How about a day without talking about it?  I’d bet most regular users can’t go a day without thinking about it. 

Do you know how long you spend on FB?  Or do you get so caught up in watching videos, linking to articles that link to more articles, or commenting on comments you don’t even notice how much time has gone by?  Do you get disappointed if a post you think particularly clever or interesting fails to draw enough attention?  If you while away hours on FB, how do you get your work done and make room in your day for personal interaction?

Many people now carry on entire conversations via FB, email or texting.  They’d rather type their thoughts than pick up the phone.  Just planning to meet a friend for coffee results in an extended back and forth that could be resolved in a short call.

Despite the use of emoticons, the printed is unable to capture many elements of communication.  We may feel a surge of validation, gain satisfaction from FB friends’ responses.  But what are we losing in terms of personal connection?

  

I’m not a big fan of birthdays. Apparently, I’m not alone…a search of “I don’t like birthdays” resulted in many hits.

To me, birthdays are often like other holidays in which a lot of anticipation, planning and preparation lead to pressure to have a great time.  To be happy, whether you are or not.  While I appreciate when friends reach out and wish me a happy day, I took the reminder off Facebook.  I don’t usually post on friends’ walls for theirs; I prefer to send good wishes in a more personal way.

On the other hand, each birthday is a milestone, and I think worthy of acknowledgement and celebration.  So I’m going to set my full plate aside and take most of the day off.  Which, even though I know we all deserve time off in general and in particular on our special day, still induces twinges of guilt.  It’s hard for me to set aside my feelancer drill, “The more you work, the more you’ll work.”  Intellectually I know that even going on a vacation won’t undermine my career or bring the flow of auditions/jobs to a screeching halt.  I know that we all need to refill our creative wells.  But it’s a challenge for me to let go of the need to keep moving forward. 

I’ll ignore approaching deadlines, a growing to do list (including contest entries to judge, lines/songs to learn for a musical revue performance, manuscript revisions and publicity/promotion preparation for my soon to be released co-authored non-fiction project) and enjoy the fun events I’ve planned. 

How do you choose to celebrate your birthday?

Asking for a raise can be a daunting process whether you’re Gainfully Employed or Gainfully Unemployed. We all need to get up the nerve, choose the right time and the right words in order to achieve the desired outcome.

Some questions to consider:
–How much of an increase is appropriate to ensure we’re earning what we’re worth but not pricing ourselves out of the market?

–Do we raise our rates across the board, for certain clients, or only new clients (in which case we can tell our current clients they’re grandfathered in and so now receiving a discount)?

–What factors do we take into account…how long we’ve worked for the client, the state of the economy, what we know about the market, what other feelancers make?

–What evidence should we prepare…client testimonials/accolades, proof of accurate and timely project delivery, any added value we provide?

–How do we make sure we come across as confident, but not off-putting?

–Do you want to make and follow through with some sort of ultimatum if your raise request is denied?

–Is there anything you’re willing to accept in lieu of money?

How to ask for a raise:
Freelancewritinggigs.com
About.com
wikiHow
Your Office Coach®

Despite today’s sophisticated technology, weathermen can’t always accurately predict the forecast. With many factors coming into play, Mother Nature is often unpredictable.

So far, today’s Chicago snowstorm is on track with posted weather advisories. But will the bulk of the snow really fall during the afternoon rush hour, and at the rate of one inch per hour? Will winds gust up to 35mph and the wind chill plummet to zero? Time will tell.

There are no models or programs or a Farmer’s Almanac to help us predict the future of our day to day lives. Freelancers rarely know when the phone will ring, or if a scheduled project will show up on time. We can’t be sure that just because last January was busy, this one will be, too. We can run through “what if” scenarios, but we can’t know which, if any, will come to pass. Which makes putting things on the calendar and setting schedules very challenging, especially for a planner like me.

No one can be sure any new venture will work out, whether it’s a new position or getting married. We evaluate decisions based on the information we have.

Often I’ll audition for something that records on, say, the 17th or 18th. Sometimes the shoot date is TBA. Or I’m asked to give my availability for the entire week. As I audition for a couple or even several projects that may shoot or record on the same day or days, I can’t know if I’ll book one or more, or what dates. I might get put on first refusal (meaning if I book another job I have to let the first one know before accepting it) or on ice/on hold (meaning I need to keep that day open), and then not know when I’ll know if I did or didn’t get the job.

At times I still think about what might happen, for example if I book a job that isn’t as good when I might also book another at the same time. Or if I don’t get anything after many auditions in a row.  Usually I can go with the flow, knowing as things change I can make adjustments to others. If I book a job for a day I’d told someone I was available, I can call and say now I’m not. But then that person has to contact whomever he/she gave my availability to, and perhaps that person has to contact others….

As I watch the snow stream past the window, falling harder and heavier, accumlating in the streets below, I’m glad that I don’t have to be out in the storm.  Another day, I might.  And the weather might be better or worse than expected.

Remember the Lay’s potato chip slogan, “Betcha can’t eat just one?”  They presume that once you taste the salty goodness, feel the crunch, a single chip won’t satisfy, and you’ll be tempted to keep popping chips into your mouth…and probably more than a single serving’s worth.

Nowadays we face a huge temptation during the workday: the Internet.  From Facebook to Twitter to online shopping to reading articles/blogs, watching videos/movies/TV shows and playing games, many of us could entertain or educate ourselves for hours.  Throw in emails and texting, and you could fritter your whole day away.  You could spend more money than you planned because of the ease of one-click purchasing or buy things you don’t really need because the sale price is so low.

Often we say, “I”ll just check Facebook.”  Or, “I’ll just read the latest about [current issue].  We make one comment or click on one link, then we might need to comment on the comment or click another link.  Soon we’re so engrossed that we might not notice how much time has gone by. 
Some sources say that too much time on the Internet can negatively impact our brains.  There’s a lot of interest in whether it’s actually an addiction or disorder. How do we resist the temptation of all things online?  Or at least stick to a certain amount of time and not let it interfere with productivity?

Some of us might succeed with the work before play approach, and reward themselves with online time at the end of the day.  Some might allocate a certain amount of time, say during a break or lunch, and use a timer.  Others might not be able to rely on their self-control, and could benefit from an accountability partner or utilize an app such as keepmeout and SelfControl, which block you from accessing sites you choose at certain times.

Other ideas:

How to spend less time online
Spend less time on Twitter and Facebook
How to spend less time on e-mail

At this time of year, it’s hard to avoid at least thinking about new year’s resolutions. Friends will undoubtedly ask, or you’ll see articles in print or online about how to make resolutions that last, such as this article in yesterday’s Chicago Tribune. 

Percentages vary, but according to many articles and sites, the vast majority of people who make resolutions don’t keep them.  Why do so many of us give up or fail, when most of us know we could make changes to improve or enhance our lives? From changing jobs or careers, losing weight and/or exercising more stopping smoking, saving more/spending less or even frittering less time on Facebook and the Internet, there’s very likely at least one thing we think will make us happier and/or more productive.

If we say we want to change, why don’t we? Because the grooves of our habits are so engrained? Or perhaps because eating fattening desserts or trolling online are fun. Discipline and self-control, or maybe the learning curve and time needed to fulfill the resolution, not so much. On the other hand, the expectation of accomplishment after doing what we say we will, getting something off our plate that’s been hanging over our heads, not procrastinating or getting into our skinny jeans could motivate us to stay on the wagon. Of not letting ourselves down and self-sabotaging our success in not only keeping the resolution but the ripple effect in other areas of our lives.

For example, many actors I know rely on agents to get them work. They say they’ll do more self-marketing to get their name out there and find other opportunities, but either don’t or only make one attempt. They may do a few online auditions. But in my experience, most don’t keep at it, nor do they follow up. If no bookings result from that effort, they feel defeated and give up. A job hunter may be waylaid by a bad interview or a few rejections. A dieter may consider her entire diet blown if she eats one piece of cheesecake.

Who said achieving our goals would be easy?  That life was fair? That we wouldn’t work hard, stumble, need to dust ourselves off and keep moving forward?

Consider the alternatives.

It’s up to us to make the most of our lives, even if sometimes we have to make lemonade out of lemons or push ourselves. Giving in to our every whim, want or desire may be fun at the moment, but can lead to feelings of guilt, lower self-esteem and dissatisfaction, which may further the downward spiral that leaves some of us with extra pounds, credit card debt, missed deadlines, etc.

Make yours a Happy New Year.

Freelancers, independent contractors and those who own their own businesses can work with many clients, each having a different approach to projects and payment.  We can establish procedures and rates.  We can ask colleagues or friends if we have concerns or aren’t sure of the best way to proceed with a given client request.  But if something doesn’t work out as planned or if clients ask for things that seem unreasonable, setting the matter to rights to the satisfaction of all parties can be a challenge.  The Gainfully Employed may be able to appeal to a boss, manager, or HR department for assistance.  The GU is on her own.

What would you do in this situation? A returning client recently sent a project. They wanted it turned around in approximately half of the usual time, which also meant I’d need to do most of the work over the weekend.  My options were: Say no, and displease and possibly lose the client.  Say yes, and rearrange my life and work harder than usual to get the job done instead of fitting in the work when convenient for me.  Say yes, but ask for additional compensation as a rush premium. 

On the one hand, I wanted to retain the client and show I could be accommodating.  On the other, I deserve to be treated and remunerated fairly.     

Awhile ago I proposed an Extras Bill of Rights for those who work as extras in films, commercials and TV shows.  In my experience, for $65 for 8 hours, plus time and half minus mealtime, extras can be expected to freeze in cold weather, fry in hot weather, stand for long periods of time or go up and down many stairs, wait in not so pleasant conditions including (inufficient light to read and/or cramped space), or watch as the cast/crew is fed snacks while they’re not.  To some, especially in this economy, eight or 12 and change dollars an hour may be enough to endure some discomfort.  What would your price be?

The Freelancers Union has been working on a Freelancer Bill of Rights.  Here’s another from the renegade WRITER.  I’ll have some additional thoughts soon.  Stay tuned.

Asking for a raise can be tricky whether you’re Gainfully Employed or Gainfully Unemployed. We all need to choose the right time and figure out what to say to achieve the desired outcome. The differences are that the GE usually receive a salary or work on commission, perhaps supplemented by a bonus, and usually only have one boss/manager. Freelancers often establish a variety of rates for different clients and projects. So if we want a raise, we may have to ask one client at a time, and may have more factors to consider.

How much of an increase is appropriate to request, after what period of employment? What evidence should you prepare to prove your value and contributions?

Some might wonder if anyone should ask for a raise in this economy. What do you lose if the employer says no? Perhaps you can have a backup plan. If he/she refuses to pay you more, can you ask for something else: more vacation time, flex time, etc.? At least you’ve gone on record that you want a raise, and documented the reasons why you should get one, laying groundwork for the next time you get up the nerve to ask.

Consider:

About.com
Yourofficecoach.com

npr.org–Women & raises
Artofmanliness.com–Men & raises