Ruth Kaufman - Award-Winning Author and Romance Writer

Ruth Kaufman is the author of My Life as a Star, My Life as an Extra, My Once & Future Love, The Bride Tournament, Follow Your Heart, At His Command and other books.

Clothes can make the woman

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At auditions, how you look matters.  You want to show the client and/or director how easy it is to see you in whatever light.

I’m asked to wear a wide variety of clothes to suit different roles I’m supposed to play.  A businesswoman requires a matched business suit (not separates), a mom a sweater set or simple blouse.  Ffor business casual, khakis and a blouse or sweater set are de rigeur.  Nice casual means good jeans and a sweater or blouse.  Solids are usually preferred over bold prints.  You need to know not only what colors look good on you and on camera, but at the various casting agencies.  One has a very blue background, so if you wear a similar shade you could blend right in and look like a floating head.

At one point I was getting a lot of doctor or pharmacist auditions. Sometimes they had lab coats we could borrow, but they were so big and baggy, with sleeves I had to roll up multiple times that I looked like a kid trying on her parents’ clothes, not a medical professional you’d believe could represent a product.  I bought my own XXS labcoat…and haven’t had a medical audition since.  

I’ve been asked to wear fitted workout clothes, holiday attire, something appropriate for a bridal shower, etc.   Once I was asked to look like someone on the TV show Laugh-In. I decided on Joanne Worley…and even put my hair up like hers.  Fortunately I had a cool vintage dress of my mom’s.  Another call was for a used streetwalker.  I teased my hair (it can get quite big), smeared my makeup and wore an off the shoulder shirt.  That, I think, helped me get a callback.

Sometimes auditionees don’t dress as instructed, and look out of place.  At a long ago audition requiring a woman in an old-fashioned butcher shop, everyone in the room had her hair up in a bun (some with tendrils) and wore some kind of cream or pale blouse.  Mine had a lace collar.  In pops a woman with short, kind of punk red hair and a bright green shirt.  She looked around the room, said something about one of these things is not like the others, and left.

On the other hand, occasionally they call in someone to push the envelope.  I’ve been the oldest person I’ve seen at a few auditions, the youngest at others.  They may toss a brunette in with blondes, a short person in with tall. 
 
You also have to think about your hair.  Sometimes I wonder if, to be a businessperson or mom, I should straighten it, because that’s the norm. But then I won’t look like my headshot, which is what they used to call me in.  So I might be the only person with curly hair.  
 
You never know what they’re looking for.  They might not even know exactly what they want until they see it.  So my goal is to be the best me I can be, given my interpretation of their parameters.

 

 

 

Giving Thanks

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This season can be stressful for feelancers who worry that work will dry up and/or wonder when the next project will show up.  From today through Hanukkah, Christmas, New Year’s Eve and into the first week of January, social events and days off abound. 

For me, all the holiday hooplah can mean fewer auditions and jobs.  If agents, clients and other industry professionals aren’t working, chances are I’m not, either.  So far one client has said there should be work in December, but until I’m officially booked…

Since it’s Thanksgiving, I won’t think about the weeks to come.  I’ll enjoy a great meal and ponder the top 10 things I’m thankful and grateful for:

1) Family & friends to share time, and laughter experiences with, and who believe in and encourage me
2) Overall good health
3) A nice roof over my head in a great neighborhood in an amazing city
4) Cultural activities from theatre to movies
5) Opportunities to pursue my dreams and goals
6) Modern technology, from computers to my cell phone, iPad, car and washer/dryer
7) Hope
8) The acting and writing communities
9) Books and TV
10) That I’m not cooking today.

Feelancers & Friends

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Feelancers often have flexible schedules.  We aren’t obligated to report to our cubes or offices at 9:00AM sharp, or have bosses overseeing our output. That doesn’t mean we don’t have important work to do or mean we don’t need to work evenings and weekends. Or that items on our to-do list won’t change at the drop of a hat. And more work is likely to pop up when we have other projects due or if we take time off…I often have two auditions, jobs or availability checks on the same day.

The good: If we have discipline and self-control and don’t procrastinate or fritter our days away on the Internet, Facebook or Twitter, we can usually decide when and how much to work on existing projects.  My favorite benefit: we can run errands when stores aren’t crowded. (I never want to shop at Trader Joe’s on the weekends; lines extend well into the aisles.)

The bad: We can’t control when new opportunities will crop up that we want or need to take advantage of.  Temptations and distractions abound.  If a deadline is a couple of weeks away, we may think we have plenty of time to finish.  So if friends or colleagues call when we’re engrossed in a project, ask for our assistance, want to grab a meal or decide to come to town and want us to be on vacation because they are, saying no can be a challenge.  It can be easy to say, “I’ll do what my friend wants today. I need a break. I was only going to self-market and catch up on a few things I’ve been meaning to do.”  Be like Scarlett and say, “I”ll worry about that tomorrow.”
 
We want to help out, we want to enjoy ourselves, but we don’t want to lose out on or get behind on work.  What seems like fun in the moment will quickly be forgotten when we’re working overtime to finish a job that’s due, or, in my case, if I don’t get to go to a major audition.  I like to have fun, but it doesn’t pay the bills or enhance my reputation/build relationships in the community.  It’s harder to have a good time when deadlines hang over your head.

Feelancers (and aspiring authors and artists) don’t always get as much respect for our time as the Gainfully Employed.  We need to be able to protect our schedules, say no, and not feel we always need or want to accommodate those who can better afford (financially, time-wise or both) to frolic.  I started this blog because some friends asked what I did all day. 

One friend’s work schedule varies, but she’s on salary.  It’s easy for her to want to grab a spontaneous lunch or run out for a mani/pedi…she’s getting paid for her time off.  Because she knows I sometimes work from home, she asks me to walk her dog when she doesn’t have coverage.  Out of town friends just came to visit and wanted me to spend several days with them enjoying all Chicago has to offer, from restaurants to shopping to shows and/or museums.  I had a long rehearsal and an audition, and needed to check my phone frequently to respond to agents and clients.  I felt some pressure to be more available, but wanted to be responsive to industry professionals and didn’t want to miss opportunities that could benefit my career and bank account.
 
Frequent schedule changes and commitment to our clients are just parts of being a feelancer.  If I’ve planned, say, lunch with a friend, I’ll need to cancel if I get a job or an audition.  Work or play?  It’s not always an easy decision.        
 
 
 
     

Social Media: Where & When

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When are we spending too much time with social media? What are the tipping points for how many sites we need to join, and how often to check them? Am I missing something by not joining, say Google+? How would a Tumblr or Pinterest account help me?

I keep hearing how this or that friend connected with this or that potential client/literary agent/useful contact via Twitter or LinkedIn. 

I still find Twitter a bit confusing.  Who to follow?  Some people tweet so frequently.  How do I keep up, and separate the wheat from the chaff?

There are social media manager services, such as HootSuite (another product to learn), some of which offer free or paid plans. (And companies are hiring SMMs.) 

So now I’m spending time figuring out which sites I want to be on and effective use strategies.

How many sites:

http://connektmarketing.com/

How much time to spend:

socialmediatoday.com

blog.verticalresponse.com

 

Are you saving enough for retirement?

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Numerous articles say that many people aren’t saving enough for retirement (for example, Huffington Post, CNNMoney and SmartMoney).  I probably know some of them: actors and other feelancers who live month to month, parents who set aside money for their kids’ college funds instead of their own futures, people who are between jobs, who lost their pensions or are earning less than they used to so they aren’t contributing as much to their 401Ks. 

How do you know if you’ll have enough to retire comfortably?  Information and calculators abound, such as AARP’s, msn MONEY’s  and Kiplinger’s. But some people don’t want to know.  They don’t want to be scared or despair over how they’ll possibly catch up, so they don’t do the math. Maybe they think it’ll all magically work out, somehow. 

The company I worked for for 13 years recently offered a one-time opportunity to take a lump sum pension payment (minus taxes and an early withdrawal penalty, or roll it into an IRA), start receiving a monthly payment, or do nothing and wait until 65 for the original pension.  I rans some numbers, checked with a few friends, did research, talked to financial advisors. But there are too many variables to be sure I’m making the right decision. What will the economy do in the next decades, including stocks and other investments, interest, inflation? How long will I live, and how long will I be able to or want to work? Only time will tell if I made the right decision.

The global economy has more impact on the American economy than in years past.  So many people are under water on their houses/condos.  So many retiring now have less to retire on than the previous generation.  Many cities, countries, individuals have greater debt.  Will there be enough jobs, enough spending by businesses and consumers to fuel the economy? 

Are you saving enough? Take the time and effort to figure it out. Knowledge is power.

Are you available?

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Steps taken before an actor books a job vary.  Sometimes there’s a direct booking, meaning you’re chosen from just your headshot and resume (and perhaps a viewing of your demo reel) or from your voiceover demo.  The vast majority of the time, there’s an audition and often a callback, especially for on-camera jobs. 

Most of the time, you don’t get it.  In fact, some acting teachers encourage you to go in with the mindset that you won’t, such as Michael Kostroff.  I’ve come across various ratios of auditions to bookings.  One in 25 isn’t uncommon.  Your callback ratio is very important too, as are the types of jobs you book, get called back for and who they’re for.   Also important is what happens after an audition/callback, even if you don’t ultimately book the job.

You could get put on hold or “on ice,” meaning you don’t have the job (yet?) but can’t accept any others on that day.  There’s also first refusal, meaning they’re interested but not ready to commit.  If you book another job for that day, you have contact the first job and give them the opportunity to book you or say no before you accept the second.  There’s also check avail (CA), which means they want to know if you’re available on a certain day…or days.  I’ve been getting more and more of these, which is both exciting and frustrating.

Exciting: My agent (and casting director, if one is involved) know the client is really interested, which means I’m on the right track.  I’ve made it to the final few. The agent has to contact me about the CA, so I’m staying top of mind.  It’s rewarding to be considered for a variety of opportunities and to get that close.

Frustrating:  There’s no way to know when I’ll find out if I get any of the jobs or not. And if I do get the gig(s), I don’t know when I’ll get the call time or location. Right now I’m on a check avail for a VO today (which I found out about around 4pm yesterday, after another check avail  yesterday afternoon for yesterday afternoon)  and another for Monday (found out on the 23rd after a first check avail received around 8pm on the 22ndfor the 25th or 26th). Whew.

I’m supposed to shoot a TV commercial next week (which I got called back for in late August and had three CAs for).  I know the day, but don’t know which of  two parts I got, when or where.  So making plans…for more auditions, other jobs, social engagements, even doctor or hair appointments, can be a challenge.  Thankfully I’m not a procrastinator, because I need to stay ahead of deadlines on other projects in case more auditions, callbacks and bookings pop up.  
 
Looking forward to finding out what’s next.
 
    

Keeping up & staying in touch

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Back in the day, if you read the daily newspaper and/or watched the evening news, you probably as well-informed as most Americans.  Editors decided what was important and relevant, and filtered out the rest.  Co-workers would gather at the water cooler to discuss  the day’s events.   

 
But now many people telecommute or freelance.  Social media sites, websites, blogs and videos continue to sprout like weeds, with zillions of column inches of material.  Some are choked by the crowded marketplace, others flourish.  It’s hard to know which sources you need and want to follow to stay in the know.     

We can all learn more about our craft and industry.  Learn to be better people and run our lives more efficiently.  Find interesting tidbits to share at parties or via our personal social media outlets.  But how much time are we willing to commit to keep up with the never-ending flow of information? 

There are too many blogs just for writers voiceover talents, actors and freelancers to stay on top of.  I hear that some literary agents and editors, producers and directors share informative tweets and/or blogs, and that Twitter can be a good way to network.  As can LinkedIn, Facebook groups, etc., etc.
 
So much of what we come across out there is fluff.  Do we really need to know what so-and-so ate for dinner?  Do we need any more binder comments?  Yet once we’ve read something, the information may stick in our heads.
 
Mashable and lifehacker are two sites that seem to offer more wheat than chaff on a variety of topics.  There are also aggregators such as Digg and Reddit that combine many sources and/or let you know what’s popular.  We could easily spend our entire day and night searching, typing and scrolling.
 
At some point, we need to stop scanning and absorbing information, no matter how fascinating, and get our work done.  We need to stop Facebook chatting, texting and emailing so we can set our keyboards, tablets and phones aside and see people.  In person.
 
 

Secondguessitis

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How many decisions do we make each day?  What to have for lunch, how to spend our time and who to spend it with, whether to say anything/what to say on social media, should we take on this client/project — from insignificant to significant, the list goes on and on. 

Some believe in the butterfly effect: that ripples from a small action can lead to major changes.  When we have to make choices, we may not know which direction to go.  Research and advice from trusted friends can help.  But sometimes, we suffer from secondguessitis.

 As an actor and writer, what to say and do at a given audition or how to satisfy requests in an editor’s revision letter from an editor can bring on symptoms of secondguessitis.  If we want the job/the book sale, we need to satisfy the buyers.  Figuring out what they really want can lead to overthinking. 

 Let’s say you’re attending a friend’s event but don’t know what to wear.  You show up in a carefully chosen outfit.  If the friend says, “You look great, aka, we love your attention to historical accuracy, but can you dress down, aka, have less historical detail?” you may choose to return to your closet and see what you can do to accommodate him/her.  How much are you willing to change?  
 
And what exactly does the request mean?  You may be able to ask your friend for specifics–should I change my earrings and/or my shoes?  But with a several hundred page manuscript, you can’t really ask the editor, “Which details did you like?”  It’s a challenge not to worry about cutting the ones they connected with or too many.  And an audition, if they say go bigger or smaller, we may wonder how much is too much.

We wouldn’t be at the audition or have the revision letter if we didn’t have something the talent buyer wanted to see and work with. But worrying too much about what he/she thinks can freeze creativity.  At some point, when making adjustments, we need to trust our instincts.  And bring to the table whatever it is makes us unique, whether or not our product resonates at that time with that client.    

Does everything happen for a reason?

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Many people believe everything happens for a reason.  Others say that to make themselves feel better when something goes wrong or they don’t get something they want, such a book sale, agent representation, new job, client or booking, or a house.  Sometimes we wonder what that reason is, or when or if we’ll find out.
 
There are quotes on the topic, a song, blog posts and assorted books about it.

Most of us know people who, for example, lost their jobs, got divorced or didn’t get into their first choice college.  They were unhappy at the time and perhaps uncertain about the future.  They might have tried to ease the sting with clichés such as “bad things happen to good people.”  But soon after, they found another job that paid more money and/or they liked better, or they met someone better to and for them, or loved the college they did get in.  In cases such as these, it’s easier to believe that EHfaR. 

Unpleasant things happen that we can’t control.  We can benefit and grow by dealing with them in healthy ways.  Other bad things happen because we don’t take steps to stop them.  We make bad choices.  Some trust in and rely on EHfaR when, for example, they fritter days away instead of working, even though they can’t afford to, or they drink, shop, or eat too much.  Because they frequently choose the high of instant gratification, of what is or seems like fun at the time, they may repeatedly pay the price with, perhaps, hangovers that impact their abilities to be productive the next day or more credit card debt…and more interest owed.  What’s the reason then?

Admitting that we’ve made mistakes or are engaging in self-destructive, self-defeating behaviors is difficult.  Accepting or finding and utilizing help can be even more challenging. 

We may never know the reason why good or bad things happen or people do what they do.  Maybe sometimes there isn’t one.   

Journey vs. Destination

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Some say life is about the journey, not the destination.  What do you think?

 Most authors don’t spend many, many hours hunched over keyboards researching, writing, editing and submitting manuscript(s) for only the joy of the process.  Most actors don’t hope for, prepare and learn lines for, and run around to auditions and callbacks only for the fun of “getting to act/practice our craft on a Thursday afternoon,” as Michael Kostroff, whoteaches Audition Psych 101, says. 
 
While I do enjoy the adventures along the way, I still want the satisfaction, validation, career and monetary benefits of getting where I’m going.  At the same time, it’s important and valuable to step back from the hustle bustle of everyday life to enjoy and be in the moment, and not think constantly about where you’re supposed to be or what you’re supposed to do next.  
 
When you’re an actress, author or feelancer, achieving goals often depends on others choosing you from among available options.  I don’t get to decide that today’s the day I’ll get to go to a great audition or that I’ll book a job, big or small.  Each opportunity to be at a major casting agency, each job is a reward in itself. 

But can it be enough?  I still want to book that national TV commercial.  Or if I get a request from an editor, to sell that manuscript.  The closer I get, the harder it is not to be frustrated and/or disappointed if I don’t. 
 
That doesn’t mean I don’t appreciate each step along the way.  Callbacks are wonderful because they show me, the talent agent and the casting director that the client thinks I’m in the ballpark.  When I get a revision letter, I know the editor or agent is very interested.  Author friends say, “You’re almost there!”  
 
“Almost there” is good.  It isn’t “there.”  So I do more work to prepare for the callback.  To make the revisions.  I enjoy and learn from the process while I look forward to attaining my goals.